Sunday, November 8, 2009

wow, everything seems so different. i dont know what it is, or why. all i know is, life seems different. it feels different. it feels... unexplainable.
all the small things that used to affect me, dont anymore. i guess loving you made me a stronger person, because i've always had to hide it when you lied, or when you hurt me, or when you walked away.
but you know what, im thankful for that. because now i know not to make that mistake twice. and now, it doesnt hurt so much when someone walks away.
so thankyou. for being the guy you are, for teaching me that love is usually a one wat street, and i should never expect anything from you, unless im expecting lies.

*************************************************************************************

i am seriously missing school at the moment. and would love to go back.
even if just for a day or two, to be back in classes like we used to be. everything ended all so quickly. i feel like i didnt get a chance to say a proper goodbye. to the school or the people.
i know i'll never forget you guys, you all made life such a wonderful thing in the two years i was there. the fun, the games, the dancing... watching the boys go from refusing to dance, to loving it and wanting to it again.
these memories are etched in my mind, and in my heart. and even though it was only two years, i feel like i've been there forever, and the friendships forged, will hopefully carry through, because you're all people i dont wanna lose.

************************************************************************************

hmmm, being at home gives me wayyy too much time to think.
and atm, im thinking all the wrong things
so im actually looking forward to work. atlest i wont have the chance to be thinking about my screwed up personal life when im helping customers (Y)
i wonder if they changed my shift for thursday... o.O
i really hope so, i wanna go on that sleepover !
and wednesday should be good. cant wait for the partyy. atleast il meet up with heaps of mates again.

ahhh crap, still need to sign out ><>

anyway, i think i've had my rant for now.
i shall be back later, when i have something else i need to get out of my head (Y)
<3

6:29 PM

Monday, October 5, 2009

wow... 2 days into the holidays and it's still just sinking in that i'll never be a school kid again ><

i miss year 12 like crazy- even though the hsc is the major down point and that hurdle still needs to be overcome- its been an amazing year.

HAHS '09 are the best group ^^

to theJBJcrew - i absolutely totally LOVE you all. you are the most amazing people i know, thankyou so much for 2 years of laughs, dancing, acting stupid and friendships il never forget.

You all made moving to hurlstone that much more awesome for me.

****************************************************

im trying to study for the upcoming amazingly uber awesome (NOT) hsc, but i really cant concentrate ><

memories of highschool are always the strongest when you really want to get some hardcore study done =(

Boarder-Daygo rugby match... what can i say ? that was an awesome awesome day
Boarders won of course...that was expected... but heyy daygo's rached double digits =P gotta be proud of that...

**************************************************************

i think its time to get serious about studying...

Good Luck with the HSC peeps,

Remember to keep smiling no matter what, and study as much as you can...without going insane

(the hsc is NOT the end of the world, as much as some of us may think that)

ENJOY YOURSELVES ! (will be back to blogging after this damn exam is over)

<33

7:34 PM

Thursday, September 24, 2009

*sighh* the image of childish innocence and freedom.

of never worrying about the world around you or
wondering "what could have been."

i miss those days ><
im at the stage where im reminiscing about school days. i have 2 days left of school, and everything seems to be coming back now.
All the fun and games. the good and the bad. the friendships and the issues... and i know im going to miss every single thing i had told myself i would never miss when i left school.

This final week should be good, with all the "ending" formalities; final assembly; rugby; yr 12 breakfast and what not... but its going to be such a hard hit when we look at each other on thursday and realise that will be one of the final times we'll be like that together...
I really wish i could rewind time now, i feel like there's so much i've missed, or that i should have done and said... so much i shouldn't have done.

But it's no use thinking about the negatives, but all the positives make me want to stay this way forever. Highschool was the most amazing experience, and no matter what happens now, there are people i will never forget. ^^

*****************************************************

Dance practice was good today, except i almost got knocked out by a certain someone...AGAIN ! =P
the boys are doing really well, and they're so into it... to think they didnt want to do it last year.
i know they'll miss it more than we will when it's over =)

Think i should get back to my books now. blogging is the easiest way to distract yourself when you dont want to study ><
Stupid hsc, has to ruin the best experience ever by stressing everyone out =(

<3

4:30 AM

Saturday, September 19, 2009

i am currently sitting at home bored out of my brain with 4 weeks left till the hsc and zero motivation to study ><
tsfx lectures dont work ! =( they spend 3 hours motivating you to study... i walked out of there and still have no motivation what-so-ever. arghhh .
my hsc is going to go wonderfully =="

**********************************************************************

hmm, got a bit of a surprise the other day with a friend deciding to remember me. that was interesting =)
i miss my primary schools and all the fun we had as kids...

**********************************************************************

its finally hitting me that i have approximately two weeks of highschool left and the thought is just a little but intimidating ><
as much as im looking forward to uni/life outside of school....i really dont want to leave =(

But the final week should be fun; school sleepover, final assembly, muck up day, parties, border-daygo rugby match... it should all go down well (hopefully) =D

**********************************************************************

its funny how the more i promise myself i wont think of him/talk to him/ etc. the more he seems to be around ><
i hate how the smallest things people say remind me of him, and that i know him so well sometimes...
He knows he affects me, but he doesnt know just how much... every little thing he does i remember, the things he says all come back to me at the stupidest times ><

**********************************************************************

OKAII, 4 weeks left... MUST FOCUS ! ><
lets hope the hsc goes well

<3

10:48 PM

Saturday, September 12, 2009

oh goddd 5 weeks till hsc starts ><
everything seems to move so fast now.

just thinking about it makes me shiver, the memories of year 7 and 8 are still so fresh, i dont wanna think about finishing school.
the final assembly is going to be interesting, i know im going to cry.

*sighhh*
so many things are happening all at once now.
school's ending, the hsc's starting, relationships feel like they're falling apart, and new ones are being made.
Is the end of year 12 always this manic ?

*******************************************
&& i was wondering if you would remember me if i disappeared today.
What if you woke up tommorrow and the one you loved was gone ?
there's no way to bring them back, nothing you can do, and then you realise you lost your chance to tell them just how much they meant to you.

So think about it for a second, or dont think at all...
But dont lose your chance to tell someone just how much they mean to you,
you never know if you'll get the chance again.

********************************************

and even if you never feel the same way...
just know, i'll always be here for you.
I'll never forget the smile you put on my face,
and i'll never regret the pain we felt together.
I dont hold it against you that you dont feel the same way,
love has no conditions.
just know you'll always be in my heart,
and if you ever need someone to show you just how amazing you are...
Just close your eyes, and you'll find me the same as you left me,
waiting for you to smile.

***********************************************

<3

11:12 PM

Monday, August 31, 2009

hmm... Saturday was heaps good.
met with the boys at central n went to usyd... the shuttle wasnt exactly fun though, ruined my morning...oh well
Usyd was awesome, i am utterly totally in love with it !
met so many people there too... its like everybody decided to be there =)
hmm..met uo with a few other friends n decided to bum around for a bit, it was all good until i became the target of all "bullying" lol.

hmmm, found out some news that really bugged me tho ><
i guess some people dont realise certain people are ruining their lives until it's too late.
she had no right to ruin things that way, and he doesn't deserve it, no matter what may have happened...
***************

wants to go UNSW open day, but probably wont make it.... we'll see.

***************

thinks she may just do well in the hsc after all.... yay ^^

***********

<3

4:37 AM

Sunday, August 16, 2009

"And they say Love is like a bird,
Set it free.
If it returns,
it's yours.
If not,
it never was."

*******************************

And he still has me hanging on. Hoping maybe one day, he'll realise i'm here.
He'll remember i exist, and he'll finally feel the same way too.

But until then, i've let him go. I'm here as usual, hoping you'll see me, but never stopping you from being yourself.

I love him so much it hurts, but even through the pain there's a sweetness i cant explain.

Its an emptiness, a restlessness i cant explain. When you're not around, i feel lost to the world. You're touch can bring me back, and im hopin' and prayin' you'll find me before its too late.
<3

**************************************

And now i know why they say love is a sweet death.
No matter how much you hurt me, i know i'd give my life for you, without a thought.

<3

10:18 PM

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Monday, October 5, 2009

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Monday, August 31, 2009

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Welcome!

It's Me

TAGBOARD

Memoirs